The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
