Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
