You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Randomize
