Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
she was so not down for the gang bang
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
