ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
Michael Bay diarrhea
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
I think my moral compass just broke
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
