Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
Randomize
