her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize