I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize
