And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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