p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
