So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
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