have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
