Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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