Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
