do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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