Sry I called you an 8
WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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