Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
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