quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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