Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
