My friends, they love my intelligence
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
