who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Randomize
