i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
