Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
