And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
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