I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Let's get the cat blown out
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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