you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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