Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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