Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize