can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
