he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
