what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
