It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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