Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
soo... how was my night?
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
