maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
