isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
