I cannot find my penis.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
