I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
no you cant smoke seaweed
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
You don't make any sense
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