yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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