woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Randomize
