Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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