I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize