spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
