I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I will pee on everything he values.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
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