Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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