she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
