he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
