God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
She swung at the pinata with crutches
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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