sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
Farmville is her only friend.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Randomize
