when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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