You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I have already put on my inside pants.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize